Top Excuses for Buying a New Watch

Not we ever need a reason to buy a new watch, but just in case the small part of your brain where guilt resides is holding you back, here are some bona fide excuses reasons to buy a new watch.

Memorize them, because they could come in handy someday. You know why. In no particular order of utility, here are the rationales you can use for buying a new watch—or after the fact, if you've already bought one:

You want a gold Rolex Submariner? You
can have one. Photo from Rolex.

I might get promoted at work next year.

I'm thinking about writing a novel. I know it will be published and I want to inspire myself to write.

My wife is pregnant and I'm going to need something reliable to time contractions.

Global warming means more rain. More rain means that it's risky to wear my dress watch to work, but a Rolex Submariner would look fine.

I saved money this year by flying only with carry-on, cutting out orange juice for breakfast, not going to movies, and keeping the house warmed to only 60 degrees in the winter.

I haven't bought a watch in a month.

I need a watch that matches my BMW.

I need a watch that matches the tie you got me for my birthday.

I need a watch that matches my eyes.

I need a watch that matches your eyes.

My boss wears the same brand of watch and I don't want him to think that I'm an imitator.

My neighbor has a nice new car, and this is the best way to show off that I'm more successful.

It's time to buy American. (Or whatever country you're from.) I should support our country's watch industry.

I don't trust my cell phone company and I don't trust the time signal that they send to my watch.

"Honey, I can't find my watch," shouted meekly and through several walls and doors. "I'm meeting a client this evening, so I'm going to buy a new watch at lunch." And even more tepidly shouted, "Okay?"